Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Making your wedding an "Event" on Facebook & Tips to cut down on your wedding cost

So today one of my Facebook friends created an event for her and her fiance's wedding. I have only seen this done one other time, by a couple that got engaged in high school. Personally, I think this is immature and slightly tacky, but then again, weddings are the one thing I am super traditional about. Initially upon seeing this "event" I posted on twitter "In my opinion if you create a Facebook event for your wedding you are too immature to get married." My account is protected, but apparently I still offended at least one follower of mine. I know my opinion seems harsh, and the girl who responded to me said she was doing it to save money, which made me feel bad for making the generalization that everyone who creates a Facebook event for their wedding is immature. However, although social media is very abundant now and I am sure many people send out invites through Facebook, I personally think there is some things about a wedding that should be less "up with the times" and more "traditional." Invitations are one of these things. I personally would be offended if I was invited to a wedding and the only invite I got was through Facebook. I feel that it is very impersonal. Also, wedding invitations are something you can keep as a keepsake of the wedding, whether it be your own wedding or as a guest of a wedding. I know my parents, after 29 years of marriage, still have their invitation saved. Lastly, there are many other ways to cut corners and hold a cheap wedding without sacrificing more of the "expected" things, for lack of a better term.

I am an engaged woman who personally believes that the ceremony, honeymoon, and marriage is for the bride and groom, and the reception is for the guests. Although the bride and groom (and their families) spend a lot of time and money on the wedding, so do their guests. So instead of leaving this post sounding like I am bashing people and looking down upon them, I wanted to offer some tips and tricks that I have come across, through working weddings for 4 years, being a bride-to-be, and Pinterest, to save money on your wedding. And what areas you should not cut corners on, to make both the bride & groom, as well as their guests, and wallets happy.


Guest List - the easiest way to cut costs is cut the guest list. As a bride there is always a fear of not wanting to offend people by not inviting them, but at the same time, brides have to realize they are not going to make everyone happy and people will have to get over it. If you limit it to immediate family and close friends and/or get your list down to 100 invites, it will cut your budget a ton. I say invites because most likely less people will come. You don't want to make the mistake of budgeting for 100 people, inviting 125 and 120 show up.

Day - Wedding and ceremony venues are more expensive in the summer months and on Saturdays. Have a Friday or Sunday wedding sometime in the fall or winter (just not around Christmas or New Years because many people like to get married those weekends too). It is amazing looking at the price difference between a Friday wedding in October and a Saturday wedding in June.

Time of Day - Although most venues make you block a certain number of hours and the price doesn't necessarily change depending on the hours you book, the time of your wedding can reduce your cost in other ways. If you have an evening ceremony and a evening reception, guests are going to expect dinner and most likely alcohol. A full dinner is so much more expensive than heavy hor' devours, but not having enough food for the guests to eat is also not a good idea (I will talk about it later). Getting married in the late morning and having a lunch served is cheaper than dinner. However, the most cost effective would be having an early afternoon wedding (e.g. 1pm) and a reception from 2-5. You can provide your guests will light snacks and wedding cake to tie them over before dinner. Also, there is no need for alcohol at this time.

Food & Drink - I already slightly touched on this but the simplest way to cut cost is to not have alcohol. However, this is also an area you do not want to cut corners on. Yes, food for 100 people or so is very expensive, but trust me, hungry guests = unhappy guests, and you do not want unhappy people ruining your special day. Chicken is the cheapest meat to order and it can be prepared in so many ways, so if you want a full meal select chicken for price effectiveness, but also because most of your guests (besides pescetarians, vegetarians, and vegans) will enjoy it. Buffets are not necessarily cheaper than served meals; however, some benefits to having a buffet over a served meal is that guests can pick and choose what they want to eat, go back for seconds, and eat until they are satisfied. You can not do that with served meals, necessarily. Another tip, do not order your food a la carte if your caterer has that option. Although it is cheaper on the forefront, the chefs will only make what you order, which means when it is gone, it is gone. If you have 100 guests and order 100 of everything (say chicken tenders, mini quiche, cookies, etc.) you are assuming that each person is only going to take one of each, which is not the case. Many places will say when you are through you are through, which once again leads to unhappy guests and no chance that the bride and groom and possibly even the bridal party will eat. Other places may prepare you more food, but that cost will be added on at the end after the fact, and in total you may have spent more than you would have ordering for a certain number of people rather than a la carte.

Venue - This should be a no brainer, but find a venue that is inexpensive. At least in the south, many families who own farms have started renting out space for brides who want to have an outdoor wedding. If you have a family member or friend that will let you use their backyard that is always a great idea too. Remember, you are not only looking and paying for a reception venue, but also a ceremony venue. Shop around to find the best prices. Having your wedding on an "off day" will also tie into this too.

Photography - This is another area you do not want to cut corners on, but there are many ways you can cut down on the cost. Having a Friday or Sunday wedding is one way for some. Only having the photographer for a few hours rather than the whole day is another. Also, finding an amateur photographer (that does good work of course) will cut your cost significantly. Do not forfeit quality for price though. If you go with someone who is new, make sure they show you their portfolio before you make any decisions.

Flowers - If you have your heart set on using real flowers, buy them from Costco or a big supermarket like BiLo and make your own bouquet. Flower shops significantly increase their flower prices and if you do not mind putting some time in with your mother and bridesmaids, you can make beautiful bouquets for significantly less than the flower shops would have charged. If you are not set on having real flowers that you are going to toss after the wedding, artificial flowers are always another option!

Centerpieces - First, going off the flower segment, use your bridal bouquet as well as those belonging to the bridesmaids as centerpieces. Say you have 5 bridesmaids, leave 6 tables empty with a vase in the center and when the wedding party (and you) walk in, have them place their bouquet in one of the empty vases. You get double the use and do not have to think of centerpieces for those tables. The obvious thing for cutting down costs on centerpieces is DIY. Candles and mirrors are a great way to dress up a dull table. Pictures of the bride and group in cheap frames are another inexpensive way to decorate tables. You do not have to have flower arrangements that stand 4 feet tall and cost 100s of dollars, as long as you don't mind doing some work and being creative.

The Dress - Every bride wants her dream dress but spending thousands of dollars on a dress you are going to wear once is not cost effective. David's Bridal has amazing sales and always has deals going on, so you can get a dress for a couple hundred dollars or less. Department stores also have a small selection of wedding dresses, as well as white/offwhite prom dresses that would be inexpensive. Going to secondhand stores and online previously owned dresses are always an option as well.

The Wedding Party - The bigger the wedding party, the more money you will spend. Brides, just think of the cost of paying for hair and makeup for your bridal party if you have 10 bridesmaids. The bride and groom also buy the wedding party gifts which adds up quickly. Minimizing the size of your wedding party, although not cutting a significant amount of money, will help.

Cake - If you are not set on having a gorgeously decorated cake, having cupcakes significantly reduces the cost and in the end less food is wasted because you can order the exact amount you want. Going to a grocery store and getting a wedding cake their, rather than a specialty bakery will also cut costs. Another way is to buy a small wedding cake for you and your groom to cut and buy a sheet cake to keep in the kitchen. Sheet cakes are much cheaper than buying a huge wedding cake to feed all your guests. I have worked many weddings where only the top tier of the cake was real and the rest was decorated Styrofoam, with a sheet cake to feed the guests in the kitchen. Also, beware. If you tell whoever is making your cake that you have 100 guests they will tell you what size you need and usually it will be way too much. I have never worked a wedding in which there was not boxes of cake left over. If you are planning for 100 guests, get a cake that feeds about 75. You will have enough.

Invitations - The reason I started this discussion right? If you are looking to save money, skip the "Save the Dates." Although nice for your guests to have, they are definitely not necessary. Or you can send out an online Save the Date to save money. As for invitations, obviously if you read the beginning of this post I am all for invitations. However, you do not need to break the bank. There are plenty of online stores that are much cheaper and hold deals than a local boutique. David's Bridal also does invitations and are always having deals. One things many brides forget to take into consideration is cost of shipping as well as pre-stamping the return envelopes. One thing you can do now is go out and buy Forever Stamps at their current price to avoid stamp prices going up when you get married. Obviously you can send out email invitations to save money, but if you have guests that are like my grandmother, some people do not use the internet. I knew one girl who sent out regular invitations to everyone, but to save on costs, she told the "tech-savvy" individuals to respond by email and enclosed a return envelope and card to the older, more traditional generations. This cut her cost, but everyone also got the formal invitation.

Additionally, there is always the option of having a small, courthouse wedding now and renewing your vows and having a big wedding later. Like I said at the beginning of the post, the ceremony and the marriage is for the couple and the wedding reception is for the guests. If you do not have the money right now to have a wedding, but want to get married, don't have a wedding & get married. Many people think their family will be disappointed, but they will eventually understand. There is nothing wrong with starting your life as a married couple and waiting until fiances are more available to have an actual wedding.



I hope these tips helped any bride looking to cut her cost. Feel free to comment with any questions. Also, I am sorry if I offended anyone with my "Facebook Event" opinion. I understand people have different views than me, and I accept that. So I hope if you do not agree with me, you can at least accept that my opinion differs from yours.